I had a meltdown at work today. I could see it happening. I could certainly feel it happening. But my head wouldn’t stop it happening. I don’t think I made too big a goose of myself. Too bad if I did.

I went from being pissed off at what I perceive as indirect bullying, through feverishly researching the procedures for making a formal complaint and eventually ending up (5 hours & a few tears in the bathroom later) at giving up completely. The environment at work will never change and, for my own health, I will spend my time finding another job.

It takes me sooooo long to get to the point of not letting it affect me. I wish I could work out a quicker way to “rise above” and not take things so personally. Haven’t got there yet.

Is there a trick to it? Not caring? Walking away? Chucking a sickie?

For now, it is putting together some flat pack furniture, a dinner of vegemite on toast and a gastrolyte ice block, two more panadol and bed.